What Now?

It's really a very strange thing being an adult... married, kids, bills, responsibility, life changing decisions. How in the world did I get here? I'm 28. Really? I'm 28? "Yes, Amanda, you're 28." Sometimes that seems crazy to me. I can remember 30 being a far off age and now it's just around the corner. I've been married almost 7 years, my baby boy is almost 4, my baby girl is 2 now, so really my babies aren't babies anymore. I'm a homemaker (you know we wipe butts, cook, attempt to clean, play monster jams and barbie, and tend to spend the day in sweat pants covered in the sweat from the mornings run until we maybe get a shower in around 9pm and only because our husbands are like, "Really? Gross"). That's what I do for a living. Oh, and a drive a minivan too. Really, a minivan? "Yes, Amanda, you drive a minivan."

I've been in this reflective stage for a while. Thinking so much about where I've been, where I am, and where I'm going. I don't feel old (and I know 28 isn't old), but life goes on and it's surely going on!

Had you asked me where I'd be when I was 28, minivan driver would not have been a part of my answer (although the minivan doesn't bother me too much, it's spacious, drives nice, and hey, it's sort of a badge of mommy honor).

Truth be told, I'm glad I am where I am. God had better plans then I did, but here I am. My kiddies are growing up before my eyes. C is almost potty trained (Holla!! No more diapers!!), L is starting preschool next year with C to follow come the next year. The house work gets done, usually, and much easier then when they were crawling or baby explorers. I'm finding more time for myself (not a whole lot, but enough to workout, read, and blog occasionally). Kind of a little crazy for me!!

I'm entering this new season of life and lately, I've found myself saying, "okay, now what?... have more kids??? (No! Don't do it! Not now!! Your kids are at such great ages and you actually get sleep at night!! Remember what it's like to get no sleep?? Keep trusting God on that matter, and pray hard that it's not his will right now!!) Should we get a dog??? (Really Amanda, a dog? Dogs poop and pee all over and they chew everything and then you have to take them on walks. No thank you!) Okay, okay, no more kids, no dog, should we move?? You know, get a backyard for the kids to play, have space for Matt to have the man space he's always wanted?? (Not my favorite choice here. You hate moving, Amanda!! Really everything about it... packing, unpacking, feeling unsettled... especially with kids!! And really where you are is pretty great, minus the no backyard for the kids because of the golf course and the AWFUL wallpaper in the living room, but you can live with it, moving is a bad idea!)

The more I think about it the more I keep asking myself why do we have to have a baby, get a dog, or move? Why not enjoy this season a bit? "Kick off your shoes, Amanda, enjoy your kiddies ages, go the the beach because you love it there and you can now, do big kid crafts, cook with the kids, do things you've always wanted to do with them but couldn't because they were too little. Keep getting better at this thing called mommyhood with the two amazing kids you already have. Enjoy the little bit of clean house time you have, keep working out and shoot, get in the best shape of your life, why not, you can!! Keep loving your husband and encouraging him in his new season of ministry. Be more involved, because you can!! Don't feel the need to have more kids, get a dog, or do anything crazy (except get that tattoo you really want even if people will judge you or have something to say about it, it's something you've been wanting for a while and hey, why not??)!! Just enjoy this season, girl, because who knows when the next one will arrive."

So if you were wondering what's next for the Sanders family... no kids, dogs, or houses are in our near future (unless of course it's Gods plan and not ours).

On the agenda for us... enjoy life just the way it is!

So what now for me?? Time to carpe diem the heck out of this season while I'm in it!

Cheers!